Friday, February 18, 2011

Rant and Raves

Ok, I’ll be the first to admit this week that my rants stink. Which, upon further reflection, isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Rants:


  • To sleep. Or my lack thereof. Not a surprise, given that we have an almost-three-week old baby. Still, I would like to have some. 
  • To other people around the country having awesome weather. What can I say, I’m jealous. 
Raves:
  • To amazing friends that brought us a hot dinner last night. I gorged myself silly. 
  • To my mom, who (whom? help…) suggested that she and my dad watch Benjamin so Chris and I can go out for date nights. And a meal that isn’t eaten on the fly. 
  • To my husband, whom (dangit, not again!) I overheard singing Christmas carols (among others) to the baby while changing his diaper. Don't ever change, Sweetie. 

8 comments:

  1. Lack of sleep is definitely worthy of ranting!!! I can commiserate!

    ReplyDelete
  2. So I have to ask..and only because I feel comfortable asking you...and will (probably) get a real answer...and I'm the "scared-witless-not-a-mom-but-have-(very distant)future-motherhood-on-the-mind"...is it worth it? The sleepless nights? The crying tantrums?

    I'm seriously, utterly, simply...curious. I'm a Type-A personality, so planning is in my nature. I have to pretend I have some semblance of knowledge before I embark on something so (incredibly) daunting.

    He is definitely a beautiful boy & we're so happy for you & Chris (& Bailey if he can get over it!)! :) Looking forward to reading about more adventures with the little one...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ha, GREAT question! I'm sure others will weigh in on this but here is my take:
    Short answer: yes
    Longer version: yes, with reservations. Keep in mind that I have exactly three measly weeks of parental experience. I think if babies stayed at this stage of development for a very long period of time, being a parent would be much, much harder. At this point in life Ben pretty much sleeps, poops, eats, and cries. And while we are excessively proud of his for performing those tasks with great skill; he's also just a little blog of a thing that doesn't have much in the way of a personality yet. I am dearly looking forward to watching him develop; I think that will make this stage worth it. And yet, this is also another part of me that says it's already worth it. Earlier, I was going to post something with the title 'how is it possible to love someone so completely after only knowing them for 24 hours?' but decided that was way too golly and saccharine...yet, it's true. Something about the fact that he is MY baby makes me love him completely, and without any (current) reservations. Funny how that works. Of course, some "mommy bloggers" would prefer you'd think that life as a mom is sunshine and roses and that they are the ultimate examples of motherhood. What a load of baloney. Poopy diapers and lack of sleep are NO FUN and don't let anyone convince you otherwise. I've had a few times where I've been crying right alongside Ben from lack of sleep and frustration.

    ReplyDelete
  4. But, for me, the most important thing I wanted to mention, is that it's worth it for now, AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE. Meaning, that had I been 17 and without a spouse or resources, there is no freaking way. I've never watched any of the MTV shows about teen moms but part of me is like: you idiots, what the he'll are you thinking?? Why would having a child (and the massive amou t of work that goes into caring for said child) be something that you would want to undertake? Of course, I'm projecting how I would feel onto somebody else but still... And frankly, I would have probably felt the same way though much of my 20s. I think the loss of freedoms (activities, trips, impulsive stuff) is going to be one of the harder aspects for me to deal with as I really value my independence.

    So that's my middle-of-the-night take on that question.;) statically speaking, people with children are not happier than those without (but married people are happier than the unmarried) and my stress levels have been through the roof these past few weeks but it's been a great experience so far and I'm looking forward to seeing our baby grow and develop as a person in our family.

    Any thoughts from others?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ugh, my computer's autocorrect is killing me. Sorry for all the typos in the previous posts. Dearly wish there was an edit feature in blogger posts...

    ReplyDelete
  6. It is worth it a million times over. When you see and hold that beautiful baby in your arms and they are so completely perfect and everything you wished and hoped for it is worth it. To know that you are the one who can comfort and provide...make it better...it is worth it.

    I have a toddler (2 next month) and an almost 6 month old, and while I am exhausted at the end of every day, and yes still getting up at night, (Even on the rare occasion for my 2 year old) I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

    The moment they arrived in this world...actually the moment I found out I was pregnant with both my life became better. I became better. I am a better person because of my kids. I strive to be the best I can be for them. Do I fall short? Sure. I'm human. But, is it worth the trying...the trials and errors?

    To say something I would never say in front of my kids: OH HELL YEAH!!! ;)

    And this comes from a mom who is in the midst of toddler tantrums, nighttime feedings, and speech therapy for my son as well. It's not easy...but it's the BEST thing I will EVER do with my life.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sonja, I knew I would get an honest (& informative) answer from you. :) Thanks for your willingness to show the REAL side of motherhood. I have zero reason to judge, but I do have common sense, & I've interacted with many women that make (early) motherhood sound like sunshine & roses...it just doesn't seem plausible to be so perfect ALL the time. I don't have kids & my life isn't perfect all the time! With the ease of the internet, I've also seen that kind of "self-deception" through social networks & blogs; the psychologist in me cries foul when I see many acquaintances with kids posting about how perfect everything is...it's like they post it to convince themselves & the world that their life is sunshine & roses. (Not that one can't post about all the wonderful moments - but when EVERY post is the same exaggeration, it makes you wonder)

    And Amanda, thank you for bringing your experience to the table (ahem, blog). Your family runs the gamut of what I imagine are considered the most stressful children's ages - it sounds like it takes quite a bit of inner strength to get through some days. :)

    Thanks again ladies!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Chicky - Oh yes it does some days. lol Rather some moments usually. Having two young children is like living with bipolar people. ;) They're up they're down, they're up they're down. But, by the next day you're over the downs of the day before and truly remembering pretty much all of the ups.

    While I do blog about the challenges in my kids' lives (i.e. speech therapy for my son) most of it is happy stuff. Because the majority of my day are filled with fun little moments with my kids. And remember...sleep deprivation and tantrums are a finite thing. You move on from it. And tantrum wise if you have a good plan for dealing with such things they really aren't as bad as they may seem. For me...I don't get frazzled. It's not worth getting frazzled over. So sorry you don't have what you "want." You have everything you NEED. :)

    With that said...is it really worth dwelling on the occasional downsides of the day? Nah. And the positives far outweigh the negatives for most parents so that's why blogs are filled with the fun happy things. Not to mention, who wants to read a blog filled with upsetting things constantly?

    I think also there are some people who are wired to become parents. I have always wanted to be a mom. Never a doubt in my mind. I have always looked forward to it, and as a married adult yearned for it. So, when that time came I was beyond ecstatic and very prepared. I was an elementary school teacher before so discipline isn't something that I find "challenging." And with my life already revolving around children...maybe that's why I fall into it so easily with a super positive outlook on it all. My brain just works that way.

    However, I am a Type-A personality as you put it. My children are on schedules. We do not deviate from those schedules unless it's a special day (i.e. zoo trip). But, a schedule makes my children's moods better. They know what to expect day in and day out and that makes everything consistent which makes children HAPPY. :) Same with discipline. Children love/need boundaries whether they act like they do or not...it creates a happy and pleasant child.

    That probably went way off of what you were looking for, but I just had to share. :)

    ReplyDelete